An entire year has gone since my mom passed away.  While I was growing up, we were extremely close.  I was an only child and she devoted much of her time to me....maybe too much.  Because as I reached my teens and began to explore the world around me, I think my mother felt left behind and unneeded.  I've always found this sad...sad that she hadn't grown in her own life enough to accept my growth and yet still feel needed in so many other ways.  When my children came along, it filled the void that I had obviously left.  So over the years we certainly had our share of ups and downs, but as an adult I came to understand (although not always accept) her behavior.  Despite all of the friction I couldn't have asked for a better mother.  Even though I was an only child, she never spoiled me.  She taught me life lessons that I never came to realize until I was an adult myself.  She may have lacked self-confidence, but I learned to cultivate this trait and knew it was the cornerstone of all that I encountered.  As a young adult, I remember thinking I didn't want to be like her.  As an older adult, I've come to realize that in many ways I am.  I believe I took from her all the things I needed and that have helped to form me into the person I am today.  And for that, I thank her.

I saw the following format over at Raehan's, Agog and Aghast, and I thought it would be fitting to use for my blog today.  So thanks for the idea, Raehan.

What I Know About My Mother......She grew up on a farm in New Hampshire and was the 4th of 11 children. She was proud of her French heritage and enjoyed geneology. At the age of 16, she sang, "Now Is The Hour" on a NH radio station.  She left that farm at age 17 and met my dad a year later in Salem, Mass. when he'd just returned from the war.  Her life revolved around my dad, me, and her 3 grandchildren.  She was an avid and proficient knitter and made a gorgeous afghan for every single one of her nieces and nephews, in addition to many friends.  She also made me beautiful sweaters from the wool I'd bring back from Europe.  Except for one brief trip to Montreal, she never left the United States.  She was also an avid reader and enjoyed giving away her books when she finished so other people could enjoy the stories.  She was a giver....first and foremost.....with everything.  Food, handmade items, money.  My mom thrived on doing and giving for everyone else.  She was a great story teller and kept me enthralled with her childhood stories when I was a young girl.  She fostered my own addiction to reading and then writing.  She loved her coffee and she also loved to laugh.  She bragged on all my accomplishments to whoever would listen.  She was most definitely ready to join my dad 2 years after he passed on.

What I Wish I Asked You Then......Why didn't you ever give yourself more credit for all the things you learned on your own?  How did you have the courage to uproot at age 27 from Massachusetts to Ohio, traveling alone with me by train in 1954 to meet Dad for his new job in Cincinnati?  Why didn't you ever realize that just because I'd grown "up" I never grew "away?"  What one thing in life do you wish you had seen, done, or accomplished?

What I Wish I Could Ask You Now.......What is the exact recipe for your famous Pistachio Cake?  I know you were mostly self-taught, but who first taught you to knit?  What happened on Guiding Light last week when I missed that episode?  Will you come and spend some time with me here on the island so I can show you all that I love?  Will you keep your spirit close to me as I journey along my path here on earth?

I miss you Mom.....but especially today, I feel you very close to me.

And to my blog readers.....See you tomorrow........